


Love at First Waddle

by Beezow_Doo_Doo_Zopittybop_Bop_Bop



Category: Miraculous Ladybug
Genre: Cannibalism, Club Penguin AU, Crack, F/M, Incest if you squint, Love at First Sight, M/M, Mpreg, Naughty, Porn With Plot, Porn with Feelings, even if you dont squint, more like first waddle, the wonders of childbirth
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-27
Updated: 2017-07-27
Packaged: 2018-12-07 18:48:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11629683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beezow_Doo_Doo_Zopittybop_Bop_Bop/pseuds/Beezow_Doo_Doo_Zopittybop_Bop_Bop
Summary: Chat Noir doesn't expect much when he makes the account. Certainly not a hot, steamy, forbidden love with the owner of the pizzeria.Or: A Club Penguin AU that everybody asked for.





	Love at First Waddle

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Beezow_Doo_Doo_Zopittybop_Bop_Bop](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Beezow_Doo_Doo_Zopittybop_Bop_Bop/gifts).



> Warnings for smut and naughty penguin action.
> 
> God, I've been getting so many requests on tumblr to write this. Y'alls better like it and leave lots of kudos or I'm killing Chat Noir in the sequel. You've been warned.

 i logg intoo my favourite site. For paingwen intercourse. Of the sexxxxual kind ;)

jk last tiime i tryed dat my accunt goes SUSBPENDED. for 69 days. u know wut dat means, randoim a03 reader? NO PENGUWIENIE FOUR ME WIENIE!!!!

okay back to my story.

so der I wuz, makin sad faces in da corner of da nite cloob. dat wear I naughty penguiine ;) i alwooys pik up hawt anime babes frum my naughty corner in da noot club.

toonight der is a provacvative pengoown named LadybugButtHawks69. i make extruh frantick sad faces att her.

my m8ing dance WERKS!!!! she waddless over.

"hey, u flap ur flippers real good, kid," she types, not a singal type-o blood. wow. nice. ;)

"tanks, boy or girl?"

"wut u lookin for babe?"

"gurl ;)"

"u got it. i'll bee ur girl. u a giurl then?"

"no/"

":("

":)"

"ok, well..." LadybugButtHawks69 begun to wattle away.

i is desperoote tonite, so... well, dooty calls if u no wut I'm sayin...

"cum to my iggie, LadyboogButtHawk69. i have puffles."

sHe disappeared. wow no one has everr tryed so harrd to get n my penguin pantss b4/

i go to the pizzeria to pikk up sum pizza. "waiter." i wait. "waiter." still waiting. "WAITER, I NEED A PIZZA IMMMEMDIATELY IM TRYING TO PENGWOON AND CHILL>"

my waiter cums. oh shit it'sw ladybugButtHawk69.

"i thought u sed cum to ur iggie so i came 2 da pizza place."

how FUCKINGING ROMANTDICK!

"u kinow me soo well, butthawk."

"thx, wunt a pizza?"

i really wanted her pengowwoon peenus but my little sister [i've never watched this show so I don't know any of the characters so pretend this is one of the characters] is watchinggg mee plaoy so i'll hav to b subtle.

"no, ladybug butthwak, i realy wunt sum of ur... speshal sauce/"

"i thinnk i understand, shit noir."

wow she nose mi name alreddy, tru luv hits u hard. in the dick. my dikk hass ben hit. hard. in the dikk. very... luv. dickk.

suuudenly this wasn't a club penguin AU anymore cxuz its hard too rite something so CANON.

 

*****

 

i walk and run into som3one. wow it is laDyburgbutthawk69... in the flesh!

"hey, still waddleing around & makin \knew frends on CP?" she asks.

"noo those days are pasttt me." mostely cuz my mom fouund out i'd ben sendin pengNoods to hawt anime babes, butt ya.

"oh. u still wunt that pengDIKK chad noir? my... specshail sauce?"

Chat Noir i mean me thought abbbout it.

"uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh... hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh......"

i had  a sudeen flash of thoughght.

"wil it make me m-preggeged?"

"no cat guy that's gay."

cHAT NOIR was disappointed. he always wunted to hatch a healthy baby pengchild frum his manhole.

"pls."

"no."

"pls."

"ok."

theyy may hav been on the bizzy sttreats, but dat didn't stop Lerdy Berg from deliveringgg her special man sause into chat noir's naughty man cheeks.

wow i think I'm mpregarant now, i thought to myself.

THEN i wuz goin n-2 labour. jk it was labor because I'm not a british personne no offence but i just don't fancy tea all dat much, ya dig?

speakinggg of digging, lady bug built a nest for are babie hatchiling. i ddidn't no dis when we 1st met on CP, butt she iz acutuallyl an BALD EAGLER!!!!! cuz she exersisses her manly mussles so much. look it up if u do nUt belleeeve me, it is tru facks.

"fuck."

dat was da sound of my babee hatclhling cumming out ov ma greazy butt whole anD CRAKKING ON DA GROUUND, OH SHIET.

luckily da yoolkk wuz in tact soo we culde make SONNYSIDEUP eggz. yum!

i make a heaarat emoji atte my luv, ladybug butthawk 69.

she makess a screetch noise and flys awaaayay.

i smile.

not cuz i happy.

not cuz egg tastes yum.

not cuz mi greazy man butt hole hatched egg.

butt cuz i know, in my heart, dat one day she flie bakk and peck my man cnheek with herr specialal sause 1 more timeme and gimme more sunny side up egg breakafasats.

yum.

oh ya and i tell my dad and he laugh cuz HIS CP USERNAME IS LADYbugBUTTHAWK69 AND HEE IS EEGLE AND HE IS BABBY DADDZYY...

...

...

...

i guesz it wuz a insest fic afterall.

**Author's Note:**

> i wish donald trump was the egg in this fanfiction.


End file.
